When we had the post office box, we didn't get there more than twice a week and there was always a TON of mail shoved in the little box. Now that we have one at the end of the very long, hilly driveway, we walk to check it several times a day, since the schedule changes daily.
Since I'm a really big chicken, and when I'm home I like to check, it takes preparation to go. First of all, the bears are not any more afraid of me than the deer are. However, I am ALOT more afraid of bears than deer. So I put on my bug-stay-off-me hat. Then I put my phone in my pocket. I carry a baseball bat, in that casual way to imply I may just feel like softball (ha ha ha). Then I sing all the way up and down the hill.
You've got the picture, right? Nerd alert.
After all this, there is often no mail. We all know AARP starts sending out feelers once you hit 46; we're used to that. Then this year, my health insurance company (who gets most of my salary) sent me a "Hey, we know you're 50, hope you had a great birthday, now get a freaking colonoscopy". That was fun mail.
But the icing on the old cake was Wayne's mail this weekend - Wayne will be 57 next month. He got - wait for it - an invitation to take a look at the assisted living facility! I found this quite fun, as he is still trying to build a house with his two bare hands (and two very sore feet, and every other body part that hurts). He didn't share the laughter.
So, I risk my life (okay-just my dignity) to be insulted by our mail. Interesting concept. Wonder why the postal service is losing money? UPS and FEDEX just bring gifts (even if we pay for them) - THEY don't rub it in.
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