When we had the post office box, we didn't get there more than twice a week and there was always a TON of mail shoved in the little box. Now that we have one at the end of the very long, hilly driveway, we walk to check it several times a day, since the schedule changes daily.
Since I'm a really big chicken, and when I'm home I like to check, it takes preparation to go. First of all, the bears are not any more afraid of me than the deer are. However, I am ALOT more afraid of bears than deer. So I put on my bug-stay-off-me hat. Then I put my phone in my pocket. I carry a baseball bat, in that casual way to imply I may just feel like softball (ha ha ha). Then I sing all the way up and down the hill.
You've got the picture, right? Nerd alert.
After all this, there is often no mail. We all know AARP starts sending out feelers once you hit 46; we're used to that. Then this year, my health insurance company (who gets most of my salary) sent me a "Hey, we know you're 50, hope you had a great birthday, now get a freaking colonoscopy". That was fun mail.
But the icing on the old cake was Wayne's mail this weekend - Wayne will be 57 next month. He got - wait for it - an invitation to take a look at the assisted living facility! I found this quite fun, as he is still trying to build a house with his two bare hands (and two very sore feet, and every other body part that hurts). He didn't share the laughter.
So, I risk my life (okay-just my dignity) to be insulted by our mail. Interesting concept. Wonder why the postal service is losing money? UPS and FEDEX just bring gifts (even if we pay for them) - THEY don't rub it in.
This Is My Life??
Monday, June 4, 2012
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Some days are better than others...
It all started when my husband and I decided to take a stand and change banks due to their rising fees. Easy, right? We opened the new checking account, are ready to close the old one.
Problem one - totally my fault - forgot that new bank held my deposit for ten days, while I joyfully paid my bills. Oops. Okay, no checks bounced, all but one NSF fee reversed.
Problem two - debit cards have not yet arrived, two and a half weeks later. Could swear the nice lady said a week to ten days.
Okay, will write checks or use cash.
So after a really long day at work, where everyone and their mother wanted me to do something for them, I stop at the old Walmart for the elegant items of cookies and rat poison. Not to have together; and the poison is for outdoor rats on farmland, so it isn't as bad as it sounds.
My check is declined by the Walmart "telecheck" thingie. I have no cash. I have no debit card yet. I call the 800 number to be told by a machine that the check was declined and they don't know why. (This IS the number to call to find out why check was declined, by the by). I tell nice Walmart boy to hold my order while I run to the bank.
I have 7 minutes to make it to the drive thru before they close. I drop my cell phone in the parking lot. I make it to the drive thru and shout thru the tube to the nice teller what has happened. She checks. Says no reason the check should have been declined - nothing wrong with account, plenty of funds available.
I get cash. Try to return my daughter's call. Phone is not working. When I dropped it, I guess something happened. I can now text, but cannot hear other person. They, I found out, can hear me, which makes it quite amusing for them.
Went back, paid cash for rat poison and cookies and came home.
Another fun filled, Lisa Douglas (my Green Acres self) day. Back on the old farm I am now drinking 4 ounces of wine - the remaining Weight Watchers points I have for today.
Have a fun night all!!
Problem one - totally my fault - forgot that new bank held my deposit for ten days, while I joyfully paid my bills. Oops. Okay, no checks bounced, all but one NSF fee reversed.
Problem two - debit cards have not yet arrived, two and a half weeks later. Could swear the nice lady said a week to ten days.
Okay, will write checks or use cash.
So after a really long day at work, where everyone and their mother wanted me to do something for them, I stop at the old Walmart for the elegant items of cookies and rat poison. Not to have together; and the poison is for outdoor rats on farmland, so it isn't as bad as it sounds.
My check is declined by the Walmart "telecheck" thingie. I have no cash. I have no debit card yet. I call the 800 number to be told by a machine that the check was declined and they don't know why. (This IS the number to call to find out why check was declined, by the by). I tell nice Walmart boy to hold my order while I run to the bank.
I have 7 minutes to make it to the drive thru before they close. I drop my cell phone in the parking lot. I make it to the drive thru and shout thru the tube to the nice teller what has happened. She checks. Says no reason the check should have been declined - nothing wrong with account, plenty of funds available.
I get cash. Try to return my daughter's call. Phone is not working. When I dropped it, I guess something happened. I can now text, but cannot hear other person. They, I found out, can hear me, which makes it quite amusing for them.
Went back, paid cash for rat poison and cookies and came home.
Another fun filled, Lisa Douglas (my Green Acres self) day. Back on the old farm I am now drinking 4 ounces of wine - the remaining Weight Watchers points I have for today.
Have a fun night all!!
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Memory Tricks
Why can I remember most of my second grade classmates, but not to stop for bread? I think I have so much useless information clogging my brain that there isn't enough disc space left.
But the worst part is not being able to forget things I don't want to remember. With no intention, I remember almost every date when Tony had important doctors' appointments. The first cold day brings back the horrible day of diagnosis. I remember like it was yesterday, not 16 years ago, walking outside to breathe after the doctor told me it was malignant and that he would tell Tony when he woke up. And being afraid to go back in the hospital and life as we knew it coming to an end. With an 8 and 10 year old.
The death anniversary is coming up, and while I feel much better than I did in the past, I still feel so sad and can remember the "countdown". The Sunday in the coma in the living room, and he died Monday morning. The last thing he said to me was "Get some rest - you need to sleep and take care of yourself".
These are memories I both treasure and detest. I wish I could remember the good, without all the bad. But that is life isn't it? Can't enjoy the good as much without the bad.
But the worst part is not being able to forget things I don't want to remember. With no intention, I remember almost every date when Tony had important doctors' appointments. The first cold day brings back the horrible day of diagnosis. I remember like it was yesterday, not 16 years ago, walking outside to breathe after the doctor told me it was malignant and that he would tell Tony when he woke up. And being afraid to go back in the hospital and life as we knew it coming to an end. With an 8 and 10 year old.
The death anniversary is coming up, and while I feel much better than I did in the past, I still feel so sad and can remember the "countdown". The Sunday in the coma in the living room, and he died Monday morning. The last thing he said to me was "Get some rest - you need to sleep and take care of yourself".
These are memories I both treasure and detest. I wish I could remember the good, without all the bad. But that is life isn't it? Can't enjoy the good as much without the bad.
Monday, February 27, 2012
Now I can't complain anymore!
Since all I usually do is complain here, I need to shut myself up and express thanks. I am so grateful to my family and friends for the incredible birthday weekend. First of all, I really am thankful that I am 50 (sputter, spit, sigh), since poor Tony only lived to be 38. And I am lucky to have a husband that loves me and does so much work for me - starting when he fixed my old house so the bank would allow someone to buy it, as opposed to foreclosure; that saved my butt. Thank God for Short Sale! And all the car repairs, heat, hot water, roads, plumbing, electric, homemade pizza, and baked goods!!
My daughters, who even though they don't always act it, showed so much love by giving me the party (that my parents helped so much with - another thanks!).
My friends, who showed up even though they should be sick of me by now.
And my "angels" - won't embarrass anyone, but there are a few people who have moved me beyond words with their generosity; you have no idea how much you have helped. One was just yesterday, the other has been ongoing for quite a while.
This is just a giant THANK YOU!!
And soon I will be back to complaining again.
My daughters, who even though they don't always act it, showed so much love by giving me the party (that my parents helped so much with - another thanks!).
My friends, who showed up even though they should be sick of me by now.
And my "angels" - won't embarrass anyone, but there are a few people who have moved me beyond words with their generosity; you have no idea how much you have helped. One was just yesterday, the other has been ongoing for quite a while.
This is just a giant THANK YOU!!
And soon I will be back to complaining again.
Thursday, February 9, 2012
The real working poor
I won't get into politics. I have my views, but no one really cares to hear them. My problem with all politicians is that they really have NO idea what it's like to be poor.
They picture street people doing drugs, living in shelters. They think children don't know they are supposed to work. They think people enjoy the degrading act of using food stamps.
I would like them to live MY life - and many people are far worse than I am. I work, Wayne works. Through a lot of bad luck, much of which was my lack of a college education, my dead first husband, and the economy crashing, I have pretty much lost everything. But I did send my girls to school, not as much help as I wanted to be.
People know I live in a truck. Yet they still ask if I went to this or that restaurant, or a social thing. It is a struggle to keep the mud off my clothes to get to work. It's a choice between gas in the car or a haircut for 30.00. My hair has not been cut in 14 months - not by choice. I am only maybe 15,000 short and I will have a real life again - one with a house! And all the people who pretend to care about others would never "donate" a few bucks a week to a real family in trouble; they will talk the talk and take themselves out. If I had a friend or family member or acquaintance who was living a very difficult life, where every day you literally have to work to survive - make the wood for the heat, keep the fire safe, protect from storms, clear the road to get to work - I would send them a few bucks before I bought a needless trinket. But politicans certainly do NOT understand that that happens to real people. You might not know by looking at me that I play beat the bank every payday to eat and gas up the car for work. And that an extra expense of $50 really hurts. If anyone asks, this is not directed to anyone in particular - it is meant to open everyone's eyes to the reality "regular" people live right now.
So when people tell me all about their wonderful experiences, I'm not so much jealous, as shocked that they can be so self-absorbed that they tell me about it as if I can relate. The last trip I took was 3 days at the shore almost 5 years ago for my honeymoon. And that's reality for a lot of people.
So, Mr. Gingrich, instead of having the school children put the custodians out of work, perhaps YOU should live like a real person for a while. Wonder if Calista will stick around if you live in a truck.
They picture street people doing drugs, living in shelters. They think children don't know they are supposed to work. They think people enjoy the degrading act of using food stamps.
I would like them to live MY life - and many people are far worse than I am. I work, Wayne works. Through a lot of bad luck, much of which was my lack of a college education, my dead first husband, and the economy crashing, I have pretty much lost everything. But I did send my girls to school, not as much help as I wanted to be.
People know I live in a truck. Yet they still ask if I went to this or that restaurant, or a social thing. It is a struggle to keep the mud off my clothes to get to work. It's a choice between gas in the car or a haircut for 30.00. My hair has not been cut in 14 months - not by choice. I am only maybe 15,000 short and I will have a real life again - one with a house! And all the people who pretend to care about others would never "donate" a few bucks a week to a real family in trouble; they will talk the talk and take themselves out. If I had a friend or family member or acquaintance who was living a very difficult life, where every day you literally have to work to survive - make the wood for the heat, keep the fire safe, protect from storms, clear the road to get to work - I would send them a few bucks before I bought a needless trinket. But politicans certainly do NOT understand that that happens to real people. You might not know by looking at me that I play beat the bank every payday to eat and gas up the car for work. And that an extra expense of $50 really hurts. If anyone asks, this is not directed to anyone in particular - it is meant to open everyone's eyes to the reality "regular" people live right now.
So when people tell me all about their wonderful experiences, I'm not so much jealous, as shocked that they can be so self-absorbed that they tell me about it as if I can relate. The last trip I took was 3 days at the shore almost 5 years ago for my honeymoon. And that's reality for a lot of people.
So, Mr. Gingrich, instead of having the school children put the custodians out of work, perhaps YOU should live like a real person for a while. Wonder if Calista will stick around if you live in a truck.
Thursday, December 22, 2011
The Best Gift
Today my oldest baby is 27. I played over and over for her the lyrics to "The Best Gift" by Barbra Streisand. I am trying so hard to focus on positive memories - why do the horrible ones overshadow?
Like the year 1997, knowing I had to bring Tony to the hospital 12/26, knowing he would probably start actively dying, barring a miracle.
The 1995 - last normal Christmas with him hoping the lump would react to the antibiotics he was on. Needless to say, it didn't. The first one without him, in 1998, when I had my first panic attack a few days before, went through the motions, then got the flu with Ashley Christmas night. The Christmas Eve Bo got hit by a car and spent the night in the vet hospital. He was okay though.
I miss when my girls were little and I made yarn loops to count down the days till Santa came. And the Advent calendar, where every year, Ashley ate the whole months worth of chocolate by Dec. 3 and always got a second one. Wonder why she's spoiled. When she climbed on a chair to reach the top of the refrigerator to get the candy.
Tony and I got engaged on Christmas of 1981. Wayne and I got engaged on Christmas of 2006. Those were good ones.
Now I live in a place the both of us can't leave too long, since we have to keep a fire going for survival and heat, we've had trespassers, and the pipes could freeze. And the girls dogs have to be taken care of. It's really hard, and I'm really tired.
So good health, and good luck, and love, is all I wish for. And peace.
Like the year 1997, knowing I had to bring Tony to the hospital 12/26, knowing he would probably start actively dying, barring a miracle.
The 1995 - last normal Christmas with him hoping the lump would react to the antibiotics he was on. Needless to say, it didn't. The first one without him, in 1998, when I had my first panic attack a few days before, went through the motions, then got the flu with Ashley Christmas night. The Christmas Eve Bo got hit by a car and spent the night in the vet hospital. He was okay though.
I miss when my girls were little and I made yarn loops to count down the days till Santa came. And the Advent calendar, where every year, Ashley ate the whole months worth of chocolate by Dec. 3 and always got a second one. Wonder why she's spoiled. When she climbed on a chair to reach the top of the refrigerator to get the candy.
Tony and I got engaged on Christmas of 1981. Wayne and I got engaged on Christmas of 2006. Those were good ones.
Now I live in a place the both of us can't leave too long, since we have to keep a fire going for survival and heat, we've had trespassers, and the pipes could freeze. And the girls dogs have to be taken care of. It's really hard, and I'm really tired.
So good health, and good luck, and love, is all I wish for. And peace.
Monday, December 5, 2011
Hunting season
Well, the good news is there was very light traffic this morning. The bad news is, that's because it's hunting season. Grown men are out there with guns. And they are not all the brightest bulbs. First of all, why do you need to drive a camo Hummer when you live in suburbia? WTF do you think you could possibly need that ugly, gas guzzling tank to do for you? Get a good spot at Wal-Mart?
Okay, I know some people hunt to eat. Not talking about them. (Also, I believe that is one percent, if that). Why yes, bears can be a nuisance and a few of them are aggressive. HELLO???? Have you met the population? Of people? MOST of them are a nuisance, and many of them are aggressive. When do I get to sit in a tree and pick them off? Never - that's murder.
And the deer are going to be hit by cars. Well, the people are going to die of something too. Start loading! And I know from last year that the geniuses set up a "weigh station" or whatever the hell you call it, at the most congested traffic light on my way home. So yes, again, it's all about me. I do not want to sit in traffic, but I REALLY don't want to watch these Bubbas with their dead trophies.
I see the wildlife on my property, and it is so awesome. The thought of killing any of them for sport makes me want to vomit. It isn't nature - that takes care of itself. It's morons who think they are manly by killing. Not so different from some of those in prison. Shit. I hate this time of year. "Peace on earth, good will toward man, now ready, aim, fire."
Okay, I know some people hunt to eat. Not talking about them. (Also, I believe that is one percent, if that). Why yes, bears can be a nuisance and a few of them are aggressive. HELLO???? Have you met the population? Of people? MOST of them are a nuisance, and many of them are aggressive. When do I get to sit in a tree and pick them off? Never - that's murder.
And the deer are going to be hit by cars. Well, the people are going to die of something too. Start loading! And I know from last year that the geniuses set up a "weigh station" or whatever the hell you call it, at the most congested traffic light on my way home. So yes, again, it's all about me. I do not want to sit in traffic, but I REALLY don't want to watch these Bubbas with their dead trophies.
I see the wildlife on my property, and it is so awesome. The thought of killing any of them for sport makes me want to vomit. It isn't nature - that takes care of itself. It's morons who think they are manly by killing. Not so different from some of those in prison. Shit. I hate this time of year. "Peace on earth, good will toward man, now ready, aim, fire."
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